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1.06.2012

Me As A Mom: Parenting

You know how, before you have kids, you always look at how others parent and say "my kid will never do that" or "I'm not doing that."

Then you become a parent. And some things change.

Take, for instance, co-sleeping. I never wanted to get into that business. I didn't want my babe getting spoiled to sleeping with mom and dad and us NEVER have any privacy again, like we've seen with some of our friends. And let's be honest, I was afraid I'd smother and kill him.

But when your baby just wants to be held and you've only gotten a few hour-long stretches of sleep, you change your mind quickly. It took one whole day of being home from the hospital for Cooper to end up in the crook of my arm as hubby and I desperately tried to get some sleep. It happens. While on leave, if he was fussy and I needed a nap, same thing.
We've found that Cooper is in a GREAT mood in the mornings. Which is just amazing - except on the weekends when we like to stay in bed a bit longer. So those mornings, once he is fed and changed, he comes back to bed with us for a bit, and sometimes falls asleep. It's OK. Once he gets older, he'll understand it's a treat.

I said I'd never let my kid be "babysat" by the TV or a toy. But there again, I was so wrong. While I was working at home on leave, I'd have the TV on and he would stare at it - our PAT person says a lot of kids like the contrast in colors. We've also found that, when all else fails, the swing works every time. No, we don't immediately shove him into it - first we try food, check diaper, hold, etc. - but we do refer to it as the magician.

All in all, I'd say that my parenting style is a flexible, roll-with-the-punches, listen to your gut type of thing. We never know how we would deal with a particular situation until we are confronted with it, and that's what I keep reminding myself. Furthermore, I am Cooper's mommy and truly believe I know what's best for my little man. I can read the books and hear the advice but in the end, I just have that feeling where I know, without a doubt, that what I'm doing is right.

I'm not much on changing the environment to fit my kid, but changing my kid to fit the environment - it's a lot easier for him to adapt, and that makes life easier when we are somewhere else and they don't think Cooper hung the moon like we do :) At home, if he falls asleep for a short nap, the TV and lights stay on. At my doctors appointment last week, the lights stayed on while we were waiting. His babysitter knows that too, and we've told her that her job is to make sure he has a full belly, clean diaper and stays alive. Slowly, he is figuring things out -  he's learned already that he doesn't get a bottle at daycare past 4 p.m., so he demands his last one at 3:50 (no lie.)

Luckily, I have an extremely supportive husband who happens to agree with and share my outlook. As much as I said before that I would let my baby cry it out, hubby, too, can distinguish his cries and is holding me back when we know nothing is wrong. In fact, Cooper rarely cries when he goes to bed now - he "talks" to himself until he falls asleep. Honestly, it's about the sweetest thing in the world.

And of course, I can't talk about this little man without a couple of sweet photos of him.


I stole daddy's spot!

Big wide eyes!


3 comments:

  1. He is beyond adorable. Love his little face! And those beautiful eyes! You two sure made a beautiful baby! :)

    I know there are some things regarding parenting that we can say we will or won't do without a doubt, and other things are very gray area things and you couldn't have said it any better than what you said about not being able to know how you'll handle it until you're confronted with it.

    I've told a lot of people that my baby will adjust to our lives, things we do. And they tell me I'm wrong, my life will revolve around his schedule. While I see some points are important like his nap time and such, I'd never try to put him in a bind to make my plans work. But as for everything else? He'll fit into our lives and we'll make the adjustments where necessary.

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  2. I've co-slept with all of my kids. As a matter of fact, the ONLY way Gracie would sleep (she had horrible reflux) was for me to lay on my side and I would lay her across me with her feet down touching my belly and her head up and laying on my side. I literally slept on either side for months until she outgrew. I even took a nap with each of my children while we were still in the hospital.

    We've also made sure to vaccuum, play music, keep lights/tv on when our kids were sleeping at infants. I never wanted to be one of those "sssshhhhhh the baby is sleeping" parents.

    Trust your instincts. I am a huge believer in you will know what is right for your child. Your doing a great job!

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  3. Haha- I think we've all done things we said we'd never do. :) I think we are pretty similar in our parenting styles. I'm pretty laid-back and go with the flow. I really think calm parents have calm babies so I try not to get too worked up over anything. :) Love the new pics of Coop. He's a doll!

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